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There is something as regards bars and drunkards that seem to be the commonest cause of jokes. Everyone has learned a gag that begins "A man walks into a bar" (and says Ouch!) and there's no doubt that drunks can be very humorous. So listed below are a handful of bar jokes that you may not have heard before, but they are surely all awfully amusing, I guarantee you! THE CRAZY BET WITH THE BARMAN A chap walks up to the barman and states, "Do you see that glass over there in the corner? I'll wager you £30 that I can piss inside it from here!" The bartender agrees, since the glass is miles way over at the other section of the pub. Thus the man unzips and whips it out, then pisses in a million assorted directions, coming nowhere even close to the shot glass. In the meantime the barman is laughing so hard he can barely breathe. "Pay up," says the barman, and merrily takes the money. Meanwhile the guy pays up, and walks over then grabs £200 from a third guy playing pool. The barman calls him back and demands, "Why would that chap hand over you the money?" And the original man states, "'Cause I bet him £200 that I can piss all over your bar and you would merely laugh about it!" SEXY LADY IN A QUIET LOCAL BAR A very cute lady goes up to the bar in a quiet neighborhood pub. She gestures alluringly in the direction of the barman, who comes over immediately. As soon as he arrives, she seductively signals for him to bring his face adjacent to hers. Once he does so, she starts to softly touch his beard, which is full and bushy. "Are you the boss she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. "Actually, no" he replies. "Can you get him for me -- I ought to speak to him." She is running her hands up past his beard then into his hair. "I'm afraid that I can't," breathes the bartender, clearly aroused. "Is there something I can do?" "Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his lips and allowing him to suck them gently. "Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room." THE GUINNESS BOSS AT THE BEER CONFERENCE After the Great British Beer Festival, in London, all the international brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer. The guy from Corona sits down and states, "Hey Senor, I would like the world's most excellent beer, a Corona." The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him. The man from Budweiser says, "I'd like the greatest beer in the world, hand over me 'The King Of Beers', a Budweiser." The bartender supplies him one. The gentleman from Coors says, "I'd like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors." He gets it. The man from Guinness sits down and pronounces, "Give me an orange juice." The barman is a little taken aback, nevertheless provides him what he ordered. The other brewery presidents glare over at him and ask "Why aren't you having a Guinness?" and the Guinness president replies: "Well, I guess if you guys are having soft drinks, then so will I."
Article Source: http://www.gambling-articles.org
My name is Pat McLachlan, and I have a Home Brewing website and another for Online Jokes! So this article is perfect to promote both websites!
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